My Adopted City

It’s tough for a Delhi-born and bred kid to adopt any other city in his lifetime. By design, Delhiites are brought up with an over-the-top and falsified feeling of self-pride. They are visually and shamelessly materialistic. Boasting about their worldly possessions comes as naturally to them as pranks to a mischievous kid. However, unlike the analogy, the habit of boasting does not wither away as they mature. It may be a by-product of the ‘Delhi culture’ or quite simply, the herd mentality. Either ways, I still believe that the Seven Deadly Sins were coined by someone who spent a considerable amount of time in Delhi.

I realized this for the first time when I moved to Manila in 2004. There I was in a foreign country, trying to understand the nuances of their culture when suddenly I’m bombarded with our own national culture conflicts. My batch mates hailed from different cities of India, but majority were either from Delhi, Mumbai or Bangalore. As far back as I can remember, these cities have always behaved as three vertices of an equilateral triangle.

Bangaloreans used to keep boasting about the lovely weather and how that made it the best city to live in. Alas, their vocabulary and pronunciation never helped them win any argument. Mumbaikars kept harping on their importance as the ‘Financial Capital’ of India. After all money is what makes this world go round, right? So what if we live in matchbox sized homes, we have the sea and that’s what (also) sets the apart from the other two cities. Sorry, the Delhi-walla was still not impressed. Because with an average tall, well built and aggressive North Indian adult, you cannot win an argument with such reasoning. Not just that, Delhi justifiably does have the best food, open spaces and seasonal variations amongst the other two candidates. That according to us Delhiites is what defines a man’s existence. Luckily, studies got the better of us and arguments based on geographical nuances were relegated to the backseat.

As destiny would have it, I moved to Mumbai in 2007. Needless to say, this was much against my wishes. For the first six odd months, I always had my bags packed so that I could run away from this city at the first instance. But this was not to happen. I hated almost every aspect of this city – from living in a small house on the Eastern side of the Western suburb, to the pot-holed roads, to the blitzkrieg nature of Mumbai in general. People always seem to be in a rush here as if the Mayan’s prophecy of the apocalypse in 2012 was a certainty. Local trains, rightly termed as the ‘lifeline of Mumbai’ somehow transferred their impatience onto the populace of this city. Filth and poverty was strewn around in a visually dis-appealing cocktail and in the bargain, human life assumed little value. Monsoon propelled rains hammered down on the helpless city and for a good three months, people were literally at the mercy of Gods. People seemed cold and unattached, and their conversations were always focused around real estate or stock market. Mumbai truly was the financial nerve of India. Nothing seemed more important than making money here and life was quite mechanical.

Being a hardcore Delhiite, this unwelcome change was obviously hard to adapt. I cherish open spaces. It is a given thing if you hail from that city and is hardly a social differentiator. We define a house starting from the verandah and ending in the backyard. In Mumbai these two spaces are not available to normal or even ‘upper’ middle class people. The weather in Delhi sees the kind of variations that we read in geography textbooks. As a kid, I had the fortune of seeing what autumn and spring looks like. Delhi really does have a proper winter fashion too! Rains in Delhi were equated to romances – the kind we see in Bollywood movies. People celebrated the monsoons much like any major festival. Mumbai on the other hand took pride in having the same temperature all throughout the year. And when rains arrived, people usually preferred the safe confines of their homes.

Naturally, I had all the reasons to hate Mumbai. Then why did I end up liking this city, so much so, that I now refuse to move out?

That’s because I ‘adopted’ it. I realized that much like an adopted kid, I need to give this city time and open up to it’s quirks. I started discovering local sights and trying to grasp the pulse of the place. Mumbai is charismatic at night and there is a general sense of safety and comfort. Me being a night creature was a perfect fit for this city then! As I started exploring eating joints, delicacies, roads and festivals, I realized that my initial hatred was probably not warranted. Rains can be equally mesmerizing in Mumbai – you just have to know how to make that happen! The kind of professionalism that exists here in the corporate world is unparalleled elsewhere in India. Companies value talent and education more than your family background and connections.

With time, I moved to a bigger, better house. I acquired a car which made moving around easier and gave me an opportunity to discover Mumbai even better. I realized that to fulfill my passion of road trips, Mumbai is ideally located. It’s no wonder that I have been able to achieve my dream trips from here – something which would have been impossible given the location of Delhi. I have done several weeks-long, multi-state, tri-directional trips encompassing mountains, beaches, flatlands and deserts in one shot. If road trips had an equivalent frequent flyer miles program, I would have achieved Platinum status quite early on – thanks to this city!  

Staying independent in Mumbai truly prepares you for the real world. Of course, I have had that chance in Manila and Dubai too. But those are kind cities. Mumbai is harsh and practical. There is little time for emotions and relationships here. Hence the learning curve is steeper and you automatically become more competitive. My best friend from school (also from Delhi) discovered love here. Call it fate, or just another bait to stay on in Mumbai. But conventional wisdom dictates that once you find your companion, any city becomes more livable. To him, Mumbai gave what was missing in his life’s equation. He has now abandoned Delhi and bought a house in Vashi!

In the last four-odd years, I have learnt a lot from this city. It’s made me a more punctual, practical and an overall better person. It is difficult to instantly understand Mumbai. You have to give it time to grow on you. And trust me, when it grows, it becomes very difficult to shake it off. There definitely is some dark magic in the air which makes you get back to it every time you try to leave. After all, there is some truth to the idiom that once you settle down in Mumbai, you just cannot leave.